midnight hazelnut.

only one cup of coffee post 9p, & I probably wouldn't be blogging right now. I would be sleeping [but...I had two] it's been far too long anyway. 
All I can think to write about is what I've been doing instead of blogging. Life lately has been consumed with work & school. Babies & books. Since this is my blog & I can be truthful, I prefer books. I am blessed with an adorable job though, for those who don't know.. I'm a "teacher" in the infant room at Christ Lutheran Children's Center. I would post pictures of my chilren, but I think I signed a paper saying I would not do that. you can just imagine me bouncing some little cuties around a room.. awwww


in other news:
my first semester of seminary is going well…/... over"well"ming. both. i'm learning so much. actually learning is a gracious word for what I'm doing. it's more like reading, writing, listening, trying to process, mixed with a little blank staring, awing, and a nice slice of humble pie. I do love Gordon-Conwell. Just tonight I had a "theological discussion" with a dear friend on the subject of "God changing His mind." ….any thoughts? do share.


other things I've 'learned' or really began to focus on learning.. what it means to be made in the image, or likeness, of God… RELATIONSHIPS… so much on relationships… i'm so deficient on/in relationships.. However, they're important. i'm learning that. yes, relationships. Jesus changed the world with relationships. we're made to be in relation with one another & with God. "it is good." 


again, any thoughts? do share. do share. 

there's a really intriguing tension going on in my thought life right now between "WHAT in the world is God thinking?? Can I REALLY do this? be a counselor?? uhmm…. *worried face.*" and an absolute, better than wearing your favorite warm sweater on a cold day while eating a cookie, kind of joyful peace that I do not understand but confirms, "yes. I am called to this. I was created for this." 

I consider myself a most unlikely candidate, but isn't that how God works? not calling the qualified, but qualifying the called. Father, be glorified!! 

please be in prayer for Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary. The leaders, professors, students, alumni, future students, and families of all of the above. 

TAKE HEART!

"gettin' hitched"

Tonight I received a pretty little picture message of a pretty little [big] ring on the pretty little finger of my big sis! After I managed to stop squealing like a girl (embarrassingly) and after I got over my sadness that she is in Colorado Springs & we can't happy dance together… I somehow balanced myself at being just ecstatic for her! She is, after all, my fellow pageant queen & player of barbies.. safe to say we've consecutively dreamed of this day for years! Michael did great right!? He picked it out all on his own, kudos for that.


Subsequently, I started thinking about marriage & engagements & all that jazz. My oldest brother is married with a gorgeous wife and two beautiful children… my sister is now engaged to a handsome soldier (& they have two beautiful canine children)… and then there's me. :) So far we've gone in order, but I think it's likely my 11 year old brother will see the alter before I. 
Can it be okay that I'm okay with that? 
Today my plans concerning marriage are that I have no plans. I am honestly striving to Proverbs 16:3 that entirely. All that's to say-- the "American Dream" is wonder for some, but it is simply not my dream. I look forward to finding out what exactly my "dream" is.. stay tuned..?

Until then…

let's all don our leotards, turn up Beyonce & bust out the single ladies dance. 

whaa uh oh!!! 

do I really have that much to say?

taking on the beast that is blogging has been on my mind a lot… pretty much every time I journal.  Partially because my hand gets tired of writing, and partially because this year I've been trying to focus on using technology to good ends.  So there you have it. Only 2 sentences in and I've established a goal. Thanks for reading! au reviore!


just kidding. i suppose i will write a tad more. :) perhaps I will begin with explain my title "memoirs of mercy" …. earlier this year my church did a "New Thru 30" where, as a church, we read the entire new testament in 30 days (wowza, right.. it was a lot of reading. good reading tho)  anyway- a phrase stuck out to me that I know I have read plenty of times, yet it did not really resonate with me until now (then).
Hosea 6:6  "For I desire mercy, not sacrifice…"
another translation says:   "For I desire steadfast love and not sacrifice, the knowledge of God rather than burnt offerings."
this theme can be also found in Matthew 9:13, Matthew 12:7, Mark 12:33, 1 Samuel 15:22, Proverbs 21:3, and a fav, Micah 6:8    (props to the cross reference tool on biblios.com)
so- what is this charge to action? to me it says- put your pride in the backseat. Yes, live righteously, strive to be obedient to the decrees & commands of God. But more than all that-- he wants us to know HIM.. and if we got to know Him, know His heart and His character… we would be full of LOVE & MERCY. because we have been shown mercy. and we have been loved.  undeservedly.
I will conclude my first blog (still getting used to the word… blog…my blog..) IN conclusion:
"What makes life worthwhile is having a big enough objective, something which catches our imagination and lays hold of our allegiance..... What higher, more exalted, and more compelling goal can there be than to know God?"
-J.I. Packer